I started out thinking, "I wonder if the bakeries are open?" Which is stupid I found out because everything closes at 6pm. Think I got to thinking, I've never seen the other side of Filderstadt, so I decided to explore.
Listening to music pound through my earphones courtesy of my lovable ipod, I wound my way though the twist and turns that make up a small village. Not a right angle to be found. I came upon some bikes come out of some fields, deciding, what the hell. I decided to go check out where they had come from. Turns out that there are miles and miles... and miles of paved trails that wind in and out of the fields of corn and wheat, which are there specially for walkers, runners, and little old bikers like me. Which I found to be especially nice since, well... I have no desire to get my slow ass run over.
So I went riding in and out of the trails happy as Corrine's "Put your records on" played in my ears, and the wind blew through my hair, and I didn't even have to pedal very hard. This last part should have been a warning. Because if you don't have to pedal one way... well, it's going to suck going back.
On reflection, I suppose there are quicker ways to kill myself. Probably more humane anyways. I soon lost track of where I was, found myself in another village 7km from where I started, having to turn around and go uphill, and, ha, Lost.
I had to call Dorothee to get directions back. Yeah, I'm a dumbass. I felt bad about having to bother her too, she was running around like crazy trying to pack for her family's trip to America (They left at 5am this morning, to go on a 14hour flight across the ocean with two small kids that don't sit still well. -May God be with her.)
Anyways, I (obviously) did make it back, but had to stop several times, walk the bike a bit, and as soon as I got home I drank 3 glasses of water, several puffs on my inhalers, and did a great imitation of a fish out of water.
So, now, a little bit wiser I have decided that next time... no wait... I've decided to hell with next time. There's a reason for stationary bikes. It's so you don't have to do the trip back. Just get off the damn thing!!!
On a side note, I highly suggest reading the book: "Lamb- The Gosphel according to Bff, Christ's childhood pal" by Christopher Moore. I just finished it, and laughed so hard that I think I broke a couple ribs, (okay, just kidding about the rib part). But no really, it's great. I highly recommend it. If any of you read it let me know if you liked it. If you don't like it... well,... here's a nickel, go buy yourself a sense of humor. Here's a great passage that I loved. It starts with Josh (Jesus) working on the Beatitudes with his friend Biff who is called Levi. I know it's hard to follow who is speaking, so Jesus it's blue, and Biff is Green:
"...How are we doing on the Beatitudes?"
"Pardon me?"
"The blesseds."
"We've got: Blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness; blessed are the poor in spirit, the pure in heart, the whiners, the meek, the--"
"Wait, what are the meek?"
"Let's see, uh, here: Blessed ar the meek, for to them we shall say, 'attaboy'."
"A little weak."
"Yeah."
"Let's let the meek inherit the earth."
"Can't you give the earth to the whiners?"
"Well then, cut the whiners and give the earth to the meek."
"Okay. Earth to the meek. Here we go. Blessed are the peacemakers, the mourners, and that's it."
"How many is that?"
"Seven."
"Not enough. We need one more. How aout the dumbfucks?"
"No, Josh (Jesus), not the dumbfucks. You've done enough for the dumbfucks. Nathaniel, Thomas--"
"Blessed are the dumbfucks for they, uh- I don't know - they shall never be disappointed."
"No, I'm drawing the line at dumbfucks. Come on Josh (Jesus), why can't we have any powerful guys on our team? Why do we have to have the meek, and the poor, the oppressed, and the pissed on? Why can't we, for once, have blessed are the big powerful rich guys with swords?"
"Because they don't need us."
"Okay, but no 'Blessed are the dumbfucks.'"
"Who then?"
"Sluts?"
"No."
"How about the wankers? I can think of five or six disciples that would be really blessed."
"No wankers. I got it: Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness' sake."
"Okay, better. What are you going to give them?"
"A fruit basket."
"You can't give the meek the whole earth and these guys a fruit basket."
"Give them the kingdom of heaven."
"The poor in spirit got that."
"Everybody gets some."
"Okay then, 'share the Kingdom of Heaven.'" I wrote down.
"We could give the fruit basket to the dumbfucks."
"NO DUMBFUCKS!"
"Sorry, I just feel sorry for them."
"You feel for everyone, Josh (Jesus). It's your job."
"Oh yeah, I forgot."
Long passage I know, but it's just sooooo funny.
