Oh, becoming an au pair is easy. You find a family, you like the family, you come to live with the family (assuming the family likes you) but it's more than that. (You really have to focus on the living with the family part. Because that's what you are doing. ) This is totally unlike the roommates you have had in the past who annoy the hell out of you, eat your food, and run up and down the stairs drunk. With roommates you can scream, bitch, and ignore them if it comes to that. You can even move out when you are tired of dealing with it. No, this is an actual family with their own way of doing things, kids who you have to always be on your best behavior in front of, and you live where you work. (which means "no, you don't just say quits".) And, (this is important), there is no actual "end" to the work day. (anyone who tells you different is lying.) This means that if you are home, you are on call. Don't get me wrong, this isn't necessarily a bad thing. I'm just trying to point out the differences. The biggest one, is that they have a different way of doing things. Which takes time to get used to. Me? I'm tiptoeing around landmines, or at least it feels that way. But I will say this- because I live where I work, and the boss's (Dorothee's) word is law, it has caused me to be a lot less disorganized then I normally am. Oh I still have, as Dorothee refers to them, "Pigeon Droppings" but they are of a lesser amount than with my previous roommates.
Most Roommates that I have had have ended badly. With three down (not counting suitemates) I'm the common factor in these relationships. So maybe I'm the bad roommate. It's completely possible, but with the subordinate relationship, I've had to a lot more shutting my mouth and nodding then I would normally stomach in a straight roommate relationship. This is most likely a good thing for me. But it's not easy.
But back to the family part. Families have dramas, sometimes big, sometimes small. Sometimes happy, sometimes... not so much. I think being an au pair can have a big effect on you. For instance: being an au pair teaches you that all families are different, and most likely they have different ways of doing things (this is especially true when you are an au pair overseas). Being an au pair can also teach you that you aren't ready for kids of your own. I'm sure there have even been a few au pairs in the past who have done their time then run to the nearest gyno screaming "TIE THE TUBES!!!" But these cases are far and few between. You get to witness the happy moments, like when Carola reads English for the first time and you realize "Holy Shit! This six year old can read two languages while I'm still working on the first!" Or when Paula takes to repeating things you say like "Bow chicka Brown Cow" (the punchline from a favorite joke, which sounds really cute coming from a four year old). or when little Jane forgets her homework for the umpteenth time and you watch the mom fly into a tailspin. (Dynamics, it's all about dynamics) I'm not really sure what the point of this part of the post is. I think, mostly to talk about somethings that I have been on my mind recently. I think that my decision to become an au pair was (to this point) the most influential decision I've ever made. I don't know what the total outcome will be (that may need to be assessed 10 years down the road) but I know now that it's been educational and interesting if nothing else.
