*Sigh*

I really hate having to learn lessons- which I should already know- the hard way. I mean, really, any one of my friends in my position would be getting some really excellent advice from me. But unfortunately me advising myself- really doesn't seem to work so well. Ah well. Good news- Closure secured. I met with Thomas in Stuttgart for Starbucks this morning. We talked. It was good. I got the closure I needed, and we are remaining friends. I told him although I have feelings for him- he just can't give me what I need right now. I deserve better. Overall, I'm feeling so much better after talking with him. I think I can safely go on my final weeks and enjoy the time I have- whether I will hang with him again or not, I don't know. But I've learned not to expect too much (or really, anything) from him. Because he can't be counted on.


I need someone who I can depend on. Who when he says he will do something- I know he will. It can't be a "possibly". But things are now on a much more positive note. Added to that- I finished my classes. I'm completely done and with only three weeks left until I go home- I'm looking to enjoying them. I think I will continue to hope that Thomas gets himself cleaned up- but I won't hold my breath. He still says he loves me, and that he wants to visit me in America- I told him I would love to have him visit- but he would have to get himself cleaned up first. (good luck!)

I would also like to thank everyone who has been putting up with me through this whole thing. (Dorothee, Gina, Jessica, Davia and my mom- there are others too, but these people are probably the ones who are most sick of me and Thomas). Ummm... yeah. Sorry. I'll make it up to you at some point. Thanks for the ears and shoulders.