The Creeping Crud

I've got what my dad would call "the creeping crud"- which basically means I'm sick. I started feeling sick last night. Then during the night I started sweating and having chills now. Now I'm completely feverish, still doing to sweating/chills thing, and my stomach is revolting against me. Ugghghh. I don't feel good.

And to make matters worse, my mind is being messed with again...I think... I don't know. God, I'm tired of this. I'm really ready to come home. That's one nice thing about coming back. I just get to drop the baggage off at the plane terminal and walk away from it. Let it solve itself and leave it at that.

I'm still working on my last paper. I'm going to rope some people into looking at it for me, then I'm going to send the sucker in and request my finals. Yay! I want to be done soooo much. One less thing to stress me out.

As far as my mind being messed with, I really want to go down to Fildorado and find out what is what, but I really don't feel well. I figure I'll see how I feel these evening and take it from there. I know where he is until 10:30pm. so I can always try to track him down. Unfortunately this crud has made me have to cancel my party plans with my friends tonight. Which really bums me out. But knowing how late they will want to stay out clubbing---it's just not a good idea.

Yes Waiter, I'd like some Stress, with a side of Stress and please hold the antidote

Well, it's official. Dorothee purchased my tickets home today. I'll be leaving from Stuttgart at 11:55pm and arriving in Denver, CO at 6:25pm on Monday, August 3, 2009. Nearly 14 months after I first arrived here. And honestly... I'm ready to go. Granted, my opinion of this "readiness" changes daily- (mostly depending on how much stress I'm feeling here, and if a certain boy is being good to me or not)- but right now I'm ready to go home.

I've slept horribly the last week or so- mostly since the shit with Thomas started. I know in my mind that it's stupid to let a guy have that much control over you- but it's hard to explain that to both your heart and your sub-concious. Those two are very hardheaded. I think I've choosen not to look at this as giving up or going home because I couldn't hack it. I think that already after one year- I've proven that I can do this. (I just can't seem to successfully date German guys).

Oh, and Thomas stood me up last night. I'm not amused. Soooo... I'm not talking to him right now. Yeah.