Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know.

It's hard to know that you want the best for someone. To know that they deserve it, and so much more. And to know that you can't get it for them. They have to do it. I want to help, I want to do it for him, but I can't. And because in so many ways, I'm impotent- I just don't know how to deal.

I can't hand a visa to him

I can't get a job for him

I can't break it off with his ex for him

I can't stop his bad habits for him

I can't .... I just can't.

And I really want to.

But even then, I don't actually want to change him.

I just want him to be happier, and I think these things would make him happy.

But even if I could do all these things- He wouldn't appreicate them as much if he doesn't have to work for them. (I blame both my parents and Dorothee for that opinion).

In other news:

I am working on my last paper. Then I'll order my finals- take them- and be done with school...FOREVER!!! Muah ha ha ha ha!

Adventures Adventures everywhere but not a Visa in sight

Today Dorothee and I set forth on a great adventure, to get my visa. Whoopeeee! Of course we were missing a couple of key documents.... including my passport. Not lost, just didn't know I needed it. Oops.
Well, afterwards Dorothee asked me if I wanted to go explore Bernhausen, the city I was in, then take the bus back. Haha silly question. Because all I heard was "Would you like a chance to find some chocolate filled crossaints and go shopping?" Why yes I would. Thanks. So off I set on my second great adventure. I can tell you now, that if I keep walking as much as I have in the last week I will be in excellent shape by the time I come home. I'm fairly sure I'm walking miles a day, on including my walking around the house, after the girls and up and downstairs. (the house has four floors in all). I did come aways victoriously with a swimsuit, shorts to workout in (I go to the gym on Friday for my fitness test, which I am quite convinced I will fail, and cause the instuctor to fall over laughing). I decided to break at a cafe called Cafe Casa. I had a moccochino and a crossaint. As I sat there reading a Fluff book I felt very posh and cosmopolitain indeed. (I will be very lucky to come away from this trip with no British English accent. Dorothee and the girls, and well, all who speak English here, speak with a British accent... except me that is. Personally, I think it's all that BBC.) Oh, Jessica you will be happy to know that as I sat drinking coffee I thought about you, and deeply wished you were here. *Sniffle* Oh, and if some Hype7 people don't clue me into what happened at the auditions, I'm going to do some verbal pounding. So there.

Anyways, I made it back in one piece, and am looking forward to tomorrow. When the not yet made Schoko-Crossiant (chocolate filled crossaint) will begin calling my name once again.

I'm sooooo weak.