Since I Left Germany

It's been 9 days since I left Germany. And while I don't cry as much- I still want to go back. But the hurt is fading. Thomas still says he wants to come. Melly and friends say they want to visit. Will I ever see any of them again? I don't know. Time will tell.

I've taken the opportunity to hang out with my friends. I've gotten coffee (or smoothie in my case) with Jessica. I've hung with Annie and Betsy, and I'm looking forward to a reunion with my friends on Friday. There are bright spots. But there's a lot of sadness.

Coming home has felt like stepping through a portal. Two lives both lived by me- but completely different still. The food here is... delicious- but my tummy isn't used to it and it sits strangely. I've also had an obscene amount of headaches since coming home. I'm stressed beyond belief over having no job prospects (no matter how hard I look) and having even less money.

While I'm thankful my parents have let me settle back under their roof- my dad reminds me constantly that the roof and food aren't free and there's a price to be paid for all of it. This price comes with me doing things for him and not looking for jobs. (granted- I could be doing that now- but I've pretty much given up hope. I'm going to go the temp route).

Holly had her eye removed last Friday. One of her eyes was all scarred over, red and swollen. We decided to go ahead and have it taken out for reasons I don't think you really want to hear. She is now my pirate puppy who we have decided to teach to say "Arrrrr"- she's getting closer.

Oh, and I got one grade back. I have an A in my 1960's class. Was there any doubt? :D

Hold me like you'll never let me go. Cuz I'm leaving on a jet plane

I don't even really know where to begin. I could start with 'Dorothee kicked me out of the house' or I could go with 'Well, folks, I'm going to be home tomorrow. Even though I should be home in two more weeks'. But I think I'll go with 'My heart is breaking, not for no longer seeing my host family, or because I wasn't allowed to tell the girls bye- but because I now have next to no time to tell my friends good-bye.'

I could write all that happened- and it may be easier for me to write it here, rather than repeat it over and over later- but I'm so emotionally drained that... itt's just that it all hurts to much. I feel so betrayed. But beyond my feelings connected to the family- I'm mostly hurting because I have to leave my friends.

Things between me and Thomas are as usual a rollercoaster. Though we are currently friends if nothing else- I still love him, and telling him bye hurts. I knew it would. But it's better than when we are not good. I told Marion and Kalbchen good-bye yesterday. I told Sarah bye just an hour ago. In the morning at 6:30am Judith, Melly, Little Sarah and I will go to the airport to drop me off before they all go to work. And I will say good-bye to the rest. My flight is at 1:20pm. Luckily, instead of waiting 6 hours on my own, Thomas is going to come to the airport- or I will go to his house- and we will hang out after I have checked in until it's time for me to go back and go to the gate. Thank goodness he doesn't work until 1pm- otherwise this would be a very lonely wait.

I'm happy to go home. I just want more time here. It's just not enough. I don't feel sad about not seeing Dorothee or Alex again- at this point I'm too betrayed and hurt. I wish I could have told the girls bye- but I was never really very close to them. There has been so much I could not say on this blog before because Dorothee read it. But now... well, just because they weren't posted, doesn't mean I didn't write it all down.

This year has been.... interesting. I've learned much- and much of it was learned the hard way. I probably could have avoided a lot of trouble if I had just listened to other people. But I don't think I would have really learned anything then. Or at least- not as much.

I've just been trying to enjoy my final time here, and I have. On Thurday Judith and Melly picked me up and took me to Judith's house. We then cracked open the wine. Friday I went to Kindi with Judith and then left to go see Thomas and then to cancel my bank account and other stuff. Then I met up with Judith and Melly again in Wendlingen (where Judith lives) and we went to dinner at an Italian restaurant and then to see Harry Potter 6 in German. It would have been better had Melly and I not slept through it. Saturday I went shopping for plane stuff with Melly then went and had lunch with her and her family. We then picked up Little Sarah and the whole gang met at Judith's to go eat at DockSeven in Esslingen with live music and then we went dancing at Dick until 3am. This morning I went to the Fildorado to hang with Thomas for two hours before I went to Esslingen to meet with the gang for brunch. Since then we got ice cream and have been hanging at Judith's since then. Relaxed and chilling. My stuff is packed, and... this song is hitting close to home. So I will finish with it.

Constantly Konstanz

WARNING LONG BLOG AHEAD

But then again, I haven't been writing as often as I should, so there should be a balance somewhere in there.

Well yesterday was certainly interesting, bloggable and totally made up for the fact that there has been next to nothing happening this week.

It was decided some time ago that a group of us would go to Seenachtfest in Konstanz, Germany, which is on the German side of the Bodensee, or otherwise known as Lake Constance. This sounded like a fun idea. Evidently it's a huge part wth lots partying, music on the beach, and at dark there would be lots of fireworks. All of which sounded great. We were going to find a place to sleep, but decided it would be less expensive if we just all slept on the beach under the stars. Which sounds awesome, but when Sarah came back from her trip to Bodensee with her class she was covered in Mosquito bites and we all decided that maaayybe this wasn't the best idea. So I pushed and I prodded, and I kept asking- "Okay, then was ARE we going to do?" But by the time anything was actually done every hotel, hostel, inn and apartment in the area was completely booked. So it was decided we would sleep in the cars. ugh.

So Saturday morning Melly and Judith came to pick me up at 8am and we took off to meet up with Sarah, Marion, and Mattias (aka Kelpchen- Little Calf). Taking two cars we drove the about two hours to Konstanz.

We ate Italian, we found a place on the Switzerland side of the border to park our cars. It was behind a farm-ish looking house and we figured it would work well enough to sleep there too. We walked back to Konstanz (aka over the border) and did a little shopping in a Mall. Yes, that's right. I found a mall here, which is rather rare and it made me happy.

We then paid 15 Euros to get bracelets that let us over the walkway into the Seenachtfest which was on the other side of lots of train tracks- a good way of making sure people don't sneak in without paying.

The whole festival was basically on the beach the entire way around the lake, at least from where I could see. It had food vendors, craft vendors, lots of beer vendors, many stages set up with music- DJ, Radio personalities, and bands. It was really neat.

While others sat and lounged in lounge chairs under a canopy, I decided to walk around. I mean, really, why was I here if not to take it all in? So I walked, and I walked, and I walked. I got a braid wrap done by some women from Africa, I bought a hermite bracelet, and I rode a ship around the lake and sat back to drink some appleschorle while I watched the waves crash, yachts sail, and seagulls attack one another. It was really nice.

After all of my adventuring I went back to find my friends. We chilled out for a bit under the canopy with me singing along to the excellent mix of American music coming from the stage near by, and enjoyed soaking up the sun.

As the sun went down we decided to go get some food and find a good place to watch the fireworks. Everyone else at pizza. Me? I'm getting tired of pizza. I found a vendor called "Bonanza" where the meals came with names like "Little Jo" "Big Hoss" and etc. I had myself a "traditional American dinner" with what Angus Steak, potato wedges, and cucumber salad.

Sitting by the lake we waited.. and waited... and waited for the fireworks show to start. Though, when it did start it was on the other side of where we were sitting and in the rush to scramble over to where the fireworks could be seen I got slightly trampled.

I was amazed at how much the Germans were awed by the fireworks. Turns out they are only allowed to set them off once a year- Sylvester's Day. I'm not really sure what that is or when, but then and these organized events are the only times. So it's not like home where all you have to do is drive to Missouri and pick some up. Me? I've seen fireworks, and more impressive displays, I took the time to go to the restroom while hoping against hope that the lines were shorter. They weren't. But I did think it was interesting/funny as hell to watch as in the dark, desparate people to go to relieve next to the chainlink fence. While not hard for men, and so I thought, fairly private, I was alarmed? confused? laughing? when I saw that across from where the men were facing the chainlink fence, directly in their sight was a group of women with the same idea answering nature's call behind a vinyl banner. While the banner shielded them from the people on the sidewalk only feet away, it would have been fairly obvious on the otherside. I personally think that when you resort to these measures, and you obviously don't have a clue about your surroundings- it's time to go home and sleep it off.

After the fireworks I was tired... sooooo tired. The Seenachtfest was just beginning and there wasn't a chance in hell that I was going to make it any longer. The thing lasts until 5am. I'd been up since 7am... do the math.

Unfortunately there was a lot of people who must have also been tired because there was a mob scene, caustrophobia, and lots of pushing. So when I saw an ambulance come through and then go by I grabbed Melanie, who was holding onto Judith who was hold ing onto Sarah and we made a run for it. Why? Ambulance was Moses- we were Jews. Nuff said. I ran after the ambulance as fast as I could (not very fast) and watching people's faces as the four of us ran after the ambulance was hilarious. So here I was, running after an ambulance laughing histarically as the Germans slowly realized what had happened and began to join me. Um... I had Running with the Bulls flashes. Soon enough we were once again mobbed in, but we were a helluva lot closer.

Once we made it to the bridge that took us back over the railroad tracks to the rest of the city we watched as people streamed up the three flights of stairs and we walked over to meet Kelpchen and Marion and I pushed the button for the elevator at the bottom. This was smart for two reasons. 1) There was a stream of very drunk people walking up a winding three story staircase- I didn't feel the need to be an example in a dominos game. 2.) I'm lazy.

We walked back to the car towards Switzerland and got to the car, only to discover that although we had previously decided to stay the night there, we were wide awake and all people who would be driving were very sober. So we decided to be like German bananas and split schnell.

I fell asleep at some point and woke up to an event that I will be laughing about for years to come. I could hear Melly yelling at Judith to slow down. But she wasn't sitting in the backseat next to me like she was when I fell asleep. That and her voice was coming for behind me. I turned around to see Melly and Marion running to catch up with the car and Melly yelling at Judith through the open hatchback. This was new.

Turns out we had been in creeping slow traffic for quite a while and we evidently had been going slow enough that Marion felt it was okay to get out of her car to come over to us to ask if we had anything she could drink. Melly, being a great friend, hopped out of the car to help Marion search the trunk for something to drink. And that's when the traffic started up again. I can tell you now, that I almost cracked a rib. But that wasn't even the end of the weirdness. We saw a group of 6 people pushing a car along the road with one person inside steering. I thought, "Ah, poor people. It would suck to have your car break down and have to push it, there's not even a shoulder." Although, after talking with them... we were moving reeeallly slowly, it turns out they were just trying to save gas, and this seemed like a good idea for the slow traffic. And ya know, it did.

A while later we arrived outside my place and I began getting everything together to go inside when I discovered I didn't have my keys. This is BAD!!! See, the thing with keys here is that they are special and can't be easily duplicated, and if one is lost then everyone in the little community of townhomes and apartments that is connected to the house has to also get new keys and locks. So it's realllly expensive. We tore apart Judith's car and could find no trace of the &#$^$ keys. I panicked. Knowing this is really bad. I knew that the property manager had an extra key, Dorothee had told me that if I got locked out to go to them, but I don't think she had 4am in mind. No, definately not. So I decided to do the only thing I could. Melly and I walked over to my neighbor's house. My neighbor's name is Irena and her husband is Thomas. They have the cutest pair of fraternal twins- girl and boy. I help Irena out twice a week with the children. She knew that I was alone while the family was away in America. I called her cell phone in an attempt to not wake up the kids with the doorbell and like a sleepy little angel she came to let me in, offered me food, drink, blanket, and pillow. After telling her I would be alright and expressing my sincere graditude I fell asleep on her large comfy couch... until the kids woke up screaming 4 hours later.

In the morning I was able to get the extra key from the property manager's wife and I was able to go to my own bed and sleep a short while. I am lucky though. Because in Germany I was lucky enough to find a friend as good as Melly, who spent the morning surfing the internet, calling people, and she was somehow able to locate the person who's house we parked behind. And now my keys will be sent back to me and should arrive tomorrow. Ugh. It was awful, but that's to Melly it's not terrible.

So yeah, that's my trip to Konstanz. Any questions?

Videos

I'm running behind on getting videos up. I know. This is because I can't find my #*$&%($ flashdrive with all the #*$%& videos on it. So here's one I have finished I will be adding soon a video of my trip this last weekend to Freiburg and Strassbourg.

Without further ado here's the video of my new German friends and them teaching me to drive a manuel.

Weekend Update: Black Forest I hear thee

This weekend was nicely eventful, not as much as I was thinking it was going to be. On Friday I was going to go with Melanie and some other friends to stay the night at Astrisk's (I really need to learn how to actually spell her name) family's cabin. However, it turns out that the electricity to the cabin has to be turned on by starting a fire (this doesn't make sense to be either), so since it rained earlier, this didn't happen.

I went with Melly to her parent's house... side note: it's not only normal, but expected for kids to live at home until they are like 24 years old. In America this is called: Being A Dork. Anyways, Melly and I hung out, her mom made us a veggie and cheese tray with red wine, and we chilled for a bit before going out to meet up with the rest of the crew.

Silke, Eddie, Judith, Nadine (New girl), Sahra, Melly and me. We all piled into cars and headed to Archies. Now let me explain here: this is an "American" food restaurant. In this restaurant it vaguely resembled Applebee's in the decor, but add in Cigar store indians, baseballs, basketballs, and lots of cowboy and indian pictures. Yeah, I cringed. That and their menu was hilarious. There are old fashioned comic characters from the 50s and 60s with little talk bubbles full of German. The food portions I saw going by on plates were huge! I mean, Oink much?

I settled on Susse Weinschorle. Which is basically sweet bubbly wine, and an apple pie al a mode. Nummy. Later we went to Judith's to play Popstar on her PS2. Here's what's weird. In America I have spent years being told I can't sing. My brother, in fact, has told me on multiple occasions "Who sings this song?" then after the correct answer is given. "Okay, then let them sing it." Mean? Sure. But get this, in Germany, I can sing. Maybe it's the difference of the atmosphere, barameteric pressure, or the aliment of pluto and my elementary school principal's toupe, whatever. Every one of my friends here are jealous and say I'm the next Britney Spears, (threat or compliament? you decide.) So we play, laugh, and have lots of fun. Later all but Judith, Melly and I leave. We go upstairs to bunk down for the night.


The next morning Melly drives me to the train station to be picked up by Dorothee so we, the girls, Dorothee, and I, can drive to the Black Forest- Freudenstadt, to meet up with Alex. There's a festival of sorts going on there and we're going too. This was pretty fun, there was a go kart thing going on. It was fun at first watching the go karts filled with overage (middle age) kids race around the track which has been set up to circle through the town's main streets. But after five minutes I'm bored, and I pray for a wreck. Not serious injury, just something other than watching overage (middle age) kids live out their NASCAR fantasies.

If you want to see pictures: and I highly think you should, I suggest going to the picture portion of my site. Welcome to all who read, and thanks for those who comment: read this as comment please!!!